Guest Blog Post by Tracy Morrow: Is It Possible to Change?
Have you ever noticed how difficult it is to let go of old habits and replace them with new and healthier ones? The push to add or drop habits whether it’s eating healthier, meditating or exercising, to learning to communicate better is normally began in earnest. The percentage of people who accomplish what they’ve set out to do is relatively small though and typically done out of a dire need more than a want. For instance, an alcoholic or addict who comes clean and makes profound lifestyle changes to support his or her recovery efforts.
So, we can see change is possible. But not everything is possible to change. Knowing which is which is the key to being able to increase your level of success in making whatever changes you would like to make toward a more satisfying life.
What You Cannot Change
Your natural style of learning. Whether you are able to learn better by reading about a topic, actively experiencing it or witnessing someone else do it, that cannot be changed. Of course there is no reason to have to change that. But being aware and making any necessary adjustments will be helpful to make sure you are fully learning what you need to know to accomplish your desired change.
How you experience the world. Some people know what they are feeling immediately, the emotion happens and the thoughts catch up later. For others, thoughts come first and often times they may not know how they feel until they have had the chance to do some mental processing. “Feeler first” people will do best to create a climate of change that focuses on their feelings, such as how they will feel when the changes are made. “Thinker first” people will do best by having detailed information on the “whys” of how they should change and what it means for them on an intellectual level first. Of course that will all come into play, but it’s the approach that will make the difference.
Other people, places or things. If you are waiting for another person, place or thing to change before you make changes, you will fail every time. Those people, places or things are not responsible for the decisions you make about your own life. Amazingly, when you make changes first, those people, places or things will naturally seem to change as well.
What You Can Change
Your Response. You have a choice about how you respond to life and changing how you do this can make all the difference in the world. If you stop to think that 88% of your life is lived on autopilot you can see how much of that is reaction based living, not response based living. Response based living offers awareness and space so you may choose the best way to approach the world to support your ability to make changes.
When your responses change, everything will change.
Our reactions are like comfortable old blankets that are easy to wrap ourselves up in, although you might trick yourself into believing that it’s because you don’t have time, or some other excuse. The truth is, you feel safer without the change and therefore will talk yourself out of putting forth the effort. This isn’t so much about being lazy or being “unable” to change; it’s about feeling safe and not wanting to change even if that is only on a subconscious level. When you are aware of this you can start to ease yourself into change by becoming aware, staying mindful and choosing the best response. Then it’s only a matter of time and repetition before the change you make becomes the change you keep.
About the Author: Tracy Morrow is a wife, mother, and Personal Life Coach with certifications specializing in Conflict Resolution, Energy Psychology and Analysis/Evaluation of Emotional Issues. Her goal is to remind people how to get back to the joy of living. Visit her at Inspir3.com for more articles about Mind, Body and Spirit.